I ACCIDENTALLY GOT CAUGHT IN AN INSTAGRAM THEME AND IT’S MAKING ME MISERABLE

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I realise as I’m writing this post that you guys should *probably* get your violins out and start dabbing my face with Mansize Kleenex because as far as first world problems go, this is pretty high up there.

And yes I realise that there’s much more pressing issues out there, but I still wanted to address this because in 2017, Insta themes and Insta envy and Insta anxiety and Insta misery are all very much real things.

Who’da thought it, eh?

Anyway, let’s get on with it.

I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that my Instagram account has always had a bit of a theme.

I mean OK sure, there were the early days where I’d mostly upload blurry drunk selfies of me and my gal pals on random nights out and yes OK I admit it, my first ever upload was a picture of Havant Hobbycraft (ain’t nothing wrong with a love of beads and glitter card but y’know, whatevs). But ever since I started taking Instagram seriously, that is by attempting to grow something of a following, I’ve had a theme.

And for the most part, it hasn’t been super strict. I haven’t even been that aware of it. It’s been more along the lines of editing every photo in the same way, more out of habit than anything else – same VSCO filter, same brightness, same contrast.

So that my photos all kind of look nice together in their little grid.

You can spot a @hannahfgale photo out from a non @hannahfgale photo if you know what I’m saying.

And I don’t think that’s that wild and out there to admit. I’m sure a lot of you are the same. That even if you’re like HECK NO PAL, I JUST UPLOAD THE PHOTOS I LIKE, you still kind of edit them the same just out of routine. You like what you like, y’know?

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I noticed something weird happening with my account.

I was having a surge of new followers.

To begin with, I put it down to the fact that an old blog post of mine was going viral and people were obviously finding my account via the Instagram bar at the bottom of the page.

And then I had a River Island regram and a LIKEtoKNOW.it regram.

But then the followers continued.

And continued.

And continued.

And I was a *bit* perplexed as to what the sweet diggity was going on.

I was like THIS IS AMAZING, but also WHERE YOU COMING FROM HUN? WHO BOUGHT YOU?

And then I saw something. My grid was pinker than it had ever been before.

I’ll be honest, it wasn’t a conscious decision. I’d just started to shoot outfit snaps more regularly in front of two pink walls – one in Ipswich and one in Colchester. And then I’d bought a pink coat. And written a post about my fave pink lipsticks. And then I’d gone to Sketch. And then it was Valentine’s Day.

And y’get the gist. Pink infiltrated my Insta account on a previously unseen level.

And well, the more pink I posted, the more my followers continued to grow. There was one week where I grew just shy of 1,000 new followers and I was like hello internet, Hannah Gale has arrived, let’s pop the champagne.

And then as quickly as it started, it stopped.

Around the same time I uploaded four non-pink photos in a row.

Coincidence? Maybe.

Or maybe not.

I like pink. Don’t get me wrong, it’s my fave colour, always has been and probably always will.

And I like wearing pink. Heck I’ve got the winter coat, the bobble hat, the blanket scarf, the blazer, the Kate Spade bag, and now the cute kitten heels.

But can I keep an Instagram account that feels like an honest insight into my life whilst still maintaining PINK PINK PINK?

Can I heck.

It’s driving me crazy. I mean, just mildly crazy. Not like IT’S TAKING OVER MY LIFE, SOMEONE COME AND STROKE ME, crazy.

I like to think I have some sort of slight teeny tiny grip on reality to stop me actually full-on losing my shit over a photo-sharing app, y’know?

The weird thing is, my fave Instagram accounts to follow don’t follow a theme. Heck there’s probably not even a VSCO filter in sight. I am mildly obsessed with both @mother_of_daughters and @mother_pukka, both of who show womanhood unashamedly unfiltered.

And yet here I am over here like but where the pink coffee cups at?

It’s not a realistic theme to keep up. And y’know what? Some days I’m slobbing out at home in my grey tracksuit on my brown sofa with my silver laptop and I’m like but what if Instagram has forgotten I exist?

Can I whip together something cute and pink just off the cuff? Shall I just lay some of my fave pink things on my bed and hope people like it?

Or shall I just give the pink a rest. Shout fuck off to the theme and follow the rules set by my Insta gurus Anna and Clemmie, which are in fact that there are no rules except y’know, just be your brilliant, honest self.

I dunno.

My heart says you do you girl, but my Instagram followers say lol where da pink, gal?

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