26 signs you’re the absolute queen of basic bitches

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Because basic > not being basic, obvs.

1. You pretend your favourite shops are Zara and Whistles because you’re just so damn sophisticated, but, turns out 92 per cent of your wardrobe is from Primark.

2. Sometimes the only thing that gets you to the gym is the ability to wear your new £100 Nike trainers with ALL the bright colours on them.

3. You own Taylor Swift’s 1989 album and Ed Sheeran’s X album, because duh.

4. Your bedroom was painted hot pink as a teenager and featured a LOT of fairy lights and a Groovy Chick duvet set.

5. You own a black leather biker jacket and three pairs of black ankle boots.

6. Sometimes you buy takeaway coffee just because it makes you look so damn fucking cool when you strut down the street holding it like a successful young professional.

7. The sassy girl emoji understands you better than most of your friends.

8. Every single pair of jeans you own have rips in the knee because obviously.

9. You have New York, Thailand and Ibiza on your holiday list this year. You haven’t booked them because no money :(:(:( but you’ve bought three new bikinis and a sparkly kaftan.

10. You have a full on meltdown every time you spy something with your initial on that you don’t already own. OMFG OMFG OMFG.

11. Your dream car would be a mint green Fiat 500. End of.

12. You Instagram every single day because you fear the world may actually fall apart if people forget you exist and live a life way more superior than theirs.

13. When your bank statement comes through, you’re always slightly alarmed by how many times McDonald’s and Dominos are repeated.

14. At any given time you would probably chop off a finger for an ice-cold can of Diet Coke.

15. You spend most of the summer with your nails painted coral and most of the festive season with your nails coated in glitter. Uh huh.

16. You have two avocados that have been ‘ripening’ in a fruit bowl for the past fortnight, emergency carbs and breaded chicken in your freezer, and a variety of exceedingly sticky dipping sauces in your fridge.

17. You cry for no reason at least once a week and eat said emergency carbs and frozen chicken.

18. Your film collection is entirely made up of Bridesmaids, Mean Girls and Sex And The City.

19. You have a gold iPhone 6 to match all your dainty rose gold jewellery that you CANNOT STOP BUYING.

20. Sometimes on pay day you accidentally go INSANE and spend all the money in Paperchase, because stationery.

21. Kisstory makes your belly feel warm and fuzzy.

22. You’d count Blair Waldorf, Beyonce and Marilyn Monroe as life inspirations.

23. You use the word bae without shame.

24. You’ve could name more items from North West’s wardrobe than you could your own.

25. Sometimes on Friday evenings you order Prosecco just to feel like a fancy, rich millionaire drinking Dom Perignon, darling.

26. You own three onesies, once spent money trying to get past a hard level on Candy Crush, are excited for the Fifty Shades of Grey film and want to see One Direction live and you don’t give a FUCK what anything thinks because you are an absolute queen.

  • Georgina

    I actually do have a mint green fiat 500

    • hannahgale9

      Can you not even, we had to go with red because Chris didn’t want to be seen driving a mint green car around :(:(:(:(

  • This made me laugh, you’re very funny 🙂
    Hannah x
    Hanniemc.co.uk

  • Joy

    All so so true!! Glittery nails are also always a must in the festive season!

  • Number 9 and Number 11 are stupidly relevant to me!

    http://www.anenglishrosie94.blogspot.co.uk

  • Oh my goodness. So this turned out to be more relevant than I expected

  • Lyndsey

    LOVE!

  • No. 16. Straight up, that’s me.

    Now, I’m gonna head home and finish off my chutneys. Mango, tomato, sweet onion….

    Frankie x

    http://www.joieandthevivre.com

  • Katie

    Number 6. The exact thought that goes through my head every single time.
    So damn cool!

  • Ha creased! I love your posts!
    Reinventing Neesha ♥

  • Sophie

    Ah god groovy chick! I had a groovy chick pair of flip flops I used to strut about on holiday thinking I was well cool. Love number 6!

    http://www.sophieslittlesecrets.blogspot.com

  • Love this, I have been secretly listening to X non-stop all week (so late to the party but love it). x

  • I am amused that not one thing on this list applies to me. I feel like a winner. lol

  • Love these posts, they never fail to make me laugh!

    Kathryn
    nimblenote.blogspot.com

  • Hehe, this made me giggle

  • sad to admit, but 90% of these are true when it comes to me… x

  • If Kisstory and Friday night Prosecco make me a basic bitch then I don’t want to be right <3

    Rosie
    sassdiaries.com

  • You are like the Queen of Primark – and I mean that in the best way possible. I am so, totally jealous of all the amazing items you seem to hunt down. This is skill – a skill every girl dreams of having!

    xox

  • Hahaha, some of these apply. But c’mon, Primark isn’t all that badddd. :p

    http://www.coquettishmish.com

  • Omg this is so true to life for me I don’t know whether to feel proud or ashamed.
    Only my Fiat 500 is actually powder blue..
    LJLV | UK Personal Style

  • Zeynab

    Lol, great post made me laugh.
    Zeynab x
    The Beauty Load

  • Hahaha this was a great post! Sadly more than five of these apply to me..should I be more shame faced? I am totally basic oops. Holly x

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