OK, so to hell with it, i’m turning this into SEVEN THINGS. Because five isn’t enough. Who only loves five things in a month? And also, seven is just a much nicer number, am I right?
So, here we go…
1. St Ives facial scrub
I think I bought this once for my 14-year-old self, or maybe it came free with Sugar, either way I wasn’t entirely overwhelmed by it. But then what is an exfoliating scrub really going to do to young, beautiful, baby bum skin? Nowt, because it’s already perfect and blemish free.
I’ve been suffering with a scaly, reptile-like forehead of late. It’s just sort of that bit between my eyebrows, and every time I go to apply my foundation it gets all streaky and crumbly and disgusting and it’s been causing me great distress when I’ve been trying to apply my make-up on the commute into London.
Someone recommended this bargain bad boy on Twitter, and two weeks later, my skin is looking less aggressive and T-Rex-y, which is nice.
In a weird coincidence, St Ives actually contacted me the day after I bought it to ask if I wanted to be involved in a blogger challenge which will involve using the scrub as well as daily surprise additional items. Anything that’ll make me look more like Emma Watson and less like an ogre is fine by me, so i’ll let you know if there’s any skin miracles to come out of it.
2. Zara leopard boots
I did it, I parted with my birthday money and a bit of council tax rebate to buy these silky £90 babies. No idea if they’ll go with anything or give me blisters as I’ve only worn them about three steps so far. But they’re pretty, no? And leopard print is up there with Dumbledore, sort of.
3. Jonathan Creek
OK, so i’m seriously at least a decade out on this one. My boyfriend started watching re-runs when we first started dating and I was like BOOOOOOOORING, LET’S PUT FRIENDS ON, turns out I was wrong. For once. For anyone else that has been terribly misguided in their ways – watch this. If you love Sherlock and Luther and all that dreamy sort of murder mystery, give old Jonathan a try. That’s all.
Got the boxset for my birthday, so basically i’ve done no housework or life errands or anything important, because TV.
4. Being a housewife
OK, so i’m not technically a house wife obvs – I have a job and I’m erm, not married. But now that there is no commuting (or to-ing and fro-ing between Ipswich and London to make a relationship work) I have stupid amounts of time on my hands. I now do the ironing every Sunday. I iron pants and towels whilst watching Sunday night TV and I ENJOY IT. So that’s something mental.
Mostly I’ve been whipping up delights in the kitchen. There’s been a touch of baking – raspberry jam and coconut sponges as well as cheese scones, and comfort-food cooking, there’s a lasagne bubbling away with gooey cheese as I type this.
We’ve had beef and vegetable stew with homemade dumlings, beef burgers made from scratch, leek and potato soup and toad in the hole all within the past week, so yeah, don’t want to boast, but i’ve pretty much become Mrs Weasley, and i’m darn happy about it.
Can’t wait to get fat from real food rather than McDonald’s, so that’s exciting.
5. ASOS check smock dress
I don’t even like checks. Or so I thought. I haven’t worn a check shirt since 2010 when I was going through a confused style phase, but now look at me – bought this £22 darling last week and have ALREADY picked up another checked smock dress from Primark.
I keep wearing it all the time and don’t really want to take it off.
What I like about it is that it has long sleeves to hide my pimply, chubby arms, and a nice smock shape that hides my bloat and back fat like a right dream. In less body-obsessed chat, the monochrome print means it might actually be one of the only dresses on the planet that actually look just as good with winter black tights as golden summer pins, so that is some sort of miracle right there.
And, well £22 is pretty nifty, innit? (still available here)
6. Cat Hampurr box
I’m gutted that I can’t access the photos of this because they’re on my iPhone 5, and i’ve done something weird where it now won’t unlock, and my photos weren’t on iCloud and basically i’m a massive failure at Apple technology and i’m sorry world.
Cat Hampurr is pretty much the Glossybox for cats, and Rudey went pretty mental over it. You can either buy a one-off box for £15.95 or subscribe for a load of them at £11.95 each (and you can do so here).
Aside from food and treats (does anyone else give their cats sticks? Because there was like mini sticks and Rudey basically had a stroke over them) it came with a cat nip prawn from Cheshire & Wain. And oh my.
If you’ve never seen a cat meet cat nip then please watch the video of my little lamb acting like an absolute demon. She attacked him for a good ten minutes before pottering off to get food. In the few minutes that elapsed before she went back to said prawn, next door’s cat had run into the house, swiped the prawn and carried him away into the unknown realms past the back fence. So there you go, proof that the prawn is cat gold.
7. My iPhone 6
Despite declaring myself an absolute novice and technology and Apple products (bit of a LOL considering I call myself an online journalist, but hey, whatcha gonna do?)I treated myself to an iPhone 6 the day they came out.
I had mega trouble with EE trying to pre-order because it turned out pretty much every person in the world was like, yeah, i’d like to get me a bit of that, so the website crashed ALL DAY, for the first day pre-orders were taken.
I went for gold, and it’s much more of a rose gold than a yellow gold which was unexpected. Mostly i’m loving my new little beauty, the battery is lasting nearly all day despite my constant social media refreshing, and it isn’t covered in ghastly cracks like my iPhone 5 was (*might* have put said cracks on said iPhone 5 only two weeks after getting him, so yeah, it’ll probs be the same with this one).
My only really qualm is how glossy and silky and light it is. It keeps sliding out of my hands, and it’s already flown across the room and landed on the carpet once. I’m terrified of ever uploading to Instagram after three glasses of Cava with it. It will fall and smash and make me cry on the floor in a ball like I did last time. True story.